I had done races before and loved them but that day because the conditions changed I wanted to quit. I heard myself saying this is not fair!!!!
So much good has come into my life and most days I remember. But suddenly a raindrop falls on my face and it makes me want to fall to my knees. The day of the race I tried to convince myself how it stinks to have to create a new normal.
Now that the race is over and I cleared the clutter out of my mind I realize that by this beautiful age of 60 I have experienced many new normal times. I think back on some of them and it always felt like it was horrible for a little while. It was always easier to hold onto the clutter rather than clear it away and start new.
I see many people holding on to so much stuff from yesterday The kids grow up and we can't get rid of their school artwork and toys. Our parents die and we feel guilt over giving their things away. Cards, notes, letters, clothes that no longer fit! Sometimes we hold onto it all thinking it will bring the old days back. It is hard to let go sometimes. It is easier to fall down on our knees and hope things will return to the normal we loved. Changing the course of life is painful.
What I love about running a 5K is you are aware you are in pain but the adrenaline of the crowd cheering you on is so exciting. It sure is easier to do on a sunny day but was much harder that day as I dragged the "it stinks" clutter with me. The cars, adrenaline and people cheering were there that day as well and I almost allowed myself to quit and not experience the thrill of the finish line.
I think the holiday time is when we drag out our unreconciled feelings suitcase more than ever. The most wonderful time of the year can be very painful for many people. The days can sometimes feel cold, damp and a struggle to get through.
The experience of the race reminded me not to let the past year cloud me from enjoying the journey. Yes once again it is a very painful new normal. At the same time there is a crowd cheering us on and love and laughter is all around. Just like the race it is OK to feel pain but I do not want to make the same mistake of letting the clouds make me want to go home. I instead choose to hold hands before this new normal event starts and look up at the clouds and know there is sun up there. I must choose to see it.
I almost quit the great joy of the race that day and I thank my sister for grabbing my hand!
If you are experiencing a new normal year please try not to let clutter steal your joy. Try your hardest to enjoy the moment for it too will one day be a memory. The older we get the more new normal creations we will have to make. Here is my hand, grab it! I cheer for you!!!!!!
From the bottom of my heart, thank you for reading my words and cheering me on as well. From my family to yours I wish you all a Thanksgiving filled with JOY!