Six months down, Six months to go. The first act of 2013 has ended and we now begin the second.
I have been journaling every day since January 2005 and I recently have skimmed some of the old entries. I sometimes laugh because many times what I read for any given random date is very likely to be something I did just this week. Many of my past 15 volumes are filled with days of erands, chores, laundry, meal planning and housework just like what I will be writing tonight. Of course there are many happy celebrations, holidays, outings, births and deaths to read about as well but most days are routine. Dr. Phil always says if you do things the same way you will get the same results so I began thinking how can I change things up to make the read a bit more exciting. I want to leave the story for people to want to read and keep turning the pages.
I dont know the answer but each day I am trying to figure it out. I have been reading a lot of facebook posts lately and I am thinking there are a lot of us that are in the same boat as I am. I cannot say that I mind the homemaker routines because I have always had a nurturing personality and rather enjoy the tasks. Of course I do find on occasion that it can get lonely and a bit boring. Realistically how much household chores are there for me anymore. There are just two of us now. Most who know me would probably agree I do not like sadness, pain or tears so I do not usually stay down for very long. It is not always easy!!
I turned 54 at the end of month number six and one thing I wished for while blowing out my birthday candles was my hope to never lose the childlike silliness that lives within my heart. Children have the ability to make friends so easily. It is not as easy at our ages. I believe we all need to encourage each other and when you know someone is in your corner it helps. I read something the other day that said when I become old I do not want people to say what a cute little old lady but would rather here what is she up to now??? That is the old lady I want to be!!! So I hope to keep tryng wacky recipes like lemon mereinge cupcakes and homemade pretzels. I want to continue silly posts like Yes, I do have a Zumba tape and I also did buy kettlebells..I do cocont oil my feet and wear socks when its 90 degrees. I want people to say man she is a handful:) !!!!! A jolly handful :) What will she say and try next??
Having suffered anxiety since grade school it takes a while at times to for me to feel comfortable in my own skin. This is a day to day challenge and one I am constantly aware of and trying to improve. I will say I am trying to get more confident!! A friend and I were looking at pictures a few weeks ago and she kept trying to skip any with her. When mine came up I laughed and said I can stare at these for hours. Now, I did not say this to be arrogant or conceited. I was trying to express that I have to like me flaws and all! I will never be a fashion model, famous chef, singer or author. That is fine. I can still try new things like recipes, facecreams, hair styles, outfit ideas, home decorating. I get my best things to try from pinterest which is another great connection to others. If its a flop so what? Its better to take the chance and try then to wonder what might have been!!!
I am slowly getting my confidence and am looking for part-time work. With sweaty palms I did my first application for a clothing store I LOVE. Love is not even a strong enough word for the passion I have for their style of clothes and feel like it would be the perfect position for me. I do not know if I will hear back but during the next six months I hope I can write back and say I am working again!!!!
Im not where I need to be and each day I pray my anxiety will disappear. Menopause for some reason has triggered it a bit lately. I hope my last blog for this year will show some much needed improvement there. Encouragement and support and love gets us through it all.
My favorite letter of the alphabet is the sixth one F...Family, Friends, Faith, Fun, Fantastic, Forward, Future. It has been a great First six months for me. I am going to keep my hobby of staying connected and writing and I am working so hard at unFASTENING the belts holding me down and begin FLYING FEARLESS.
Let us all stay connected in some way with one another. Lets hold hands and begin the journey of the next six months together. Let us all encourage each other on every step that Faces us and if we do I know we will all be jumping for joy at our FABULOUS FINISH!!!
I have been journaling every day since January 2005 and I recently have skimmed some of the old entries. I sometimes laugh because many times what I read for any given random date is very likely to be something I did just this week. Many of my past 15 volumes are filled with days of erands, chores, laundry, meal planning and housework just like what I will be writing tonight. Of course there are many happy celebrations, holidays, outings, births and deaths to read about as well but most days are routine. Dr. Phil always says if you do things the same way you will get the same results so I began thinking how can I change things up to make the read a bit more exciting. I want to leave the story for people to want to read and keep turning the pages.
I dont know the answer but each day I am trying to figure it out. I have been reading a lot of facebook posts lately and I am thinking there are a lot of us that are in the same boat as I am. I cannot say that I mind the homemaker routines because I have always had a nurturing personality and rather enjoy the tasks. Of course I do find on occasion that it can get lonely and a bit boring. Realistically how much household chores are there for me anymore. There are just two of us now. Most who know me would probably agree I do not like sadness, pain or tears so I do not usually stay down for very long. It is not always easy!!
I turned 54 at the end of month number six and one thing I wished for while blowing out my birthday candles was my hope to never lose the childlike silliness that lives within my heart. Children have the ability to make friends so easily. It is not as easy at our ages. I believe we all need to encourage each other and when you know someone is in your corner it helps. I read something the other day that said when I become old I do not want people to say what a cute little old lady but would rather here what is she up to now??? That is the old lady I want to be!!! So I hope to keep tryng wacky recipes like lemon mereinge cupcakes and homemade pretzels. I want to continue silly posts like Yes, I do have a Zumba tape and I also did buy kettlebells..I do cocont oil my feet and wear socks when its 90 degrees. I want people to say man she is a handful:) !!!!! A jolly handful :) What will she say and try next??
Having suffered anxiety since grade school it takes a while at times to for me to feel comfortable in my own skin. This is a day to day challenge and one I am constantly aware of and trying to improve. I will say I am trying to get more confident!! A friend and I were looking at pictures a few weeks ago and she kept trying to skip any with her. When mine came up I laughed and said I can stare at these for hours. Now, I did not say this to be arrogant or conceited. I was trying to express that I have to like me flaws and all! I will never be a fashion model, famous chef, singer or author. That is fine. I can still try new things like recipes, facecreams, hair styles, outfit ideas, home decorating. I get my best things to try from pinterest which is another great connection to others. If its a flop so what? Its better to take the chance and try then to wonder what might have been!!!
I am slowly getting my confidence and am looking for part-time work. With sweaty palms I did my first application for a clothing store I LOVE. Love is not even a strong enough word for the passion I have for their style of clothes and feel like it would be the perfect position for me. I do not know if I will hear back but during the next six months I hope I can write back and say I am working again!!!!
Im not where I need to be and each day I pray my anxiety will disappear. Menopause for some reason has triggered it a bit lately. I hope my last blog for this year will show some much needed improvement there. Encouragement and support and love gets us through it all.
My favorite letter of the alphabet is the sixth one F...Family, Friends, Faith, Fun, Fantastic, Forward, Future. It has been a great First six months for me. I am going to keep my hobby of staying connected and writing and I am working so hard at unFASTENING the belts holding me down and begin FLYING FEARLESS.
Let us all stay connected in some way with one another. Lets hold hands and begin the journey of the next six months together. Let us all encourage each other on every step that Faces us and if we do I know we will all be jumping for joy at our FABULOUS FINISH!!!
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