Our seven year old shih-tzu always loved car trips and just the mention of the word would get her jumping with excitement. That changed six weeks ago when we were driving her to the veterinarian office for knee surgery. She sat in her normal spot in the back seat but her uncontrollable shaking proved to us she sensed she was not heading to a fun day in the park. In a moment going up a flight of stairs her knee gave out and the peaceful life she knew all of a sudden became an uncertain place. Life changed.
I was telling someone the other day I never feared life but lately I am learning it is quite possible the finish line of our dreams does not exist. Today, this moment, is really all we are guaranteed. I do not want to find myself one day shaking if I come crashing down climbing my staircase of life. I want to know I will be able to get back up but to be perfectly honest I really do not know if I can ever fully prepare myself. Can anyone prepare themselves?
The past few months I have heard many life changing moments in peoples lives. Close family members watched there house be totally demolished as it could not be saved after Storm Sandy, I attended a wake for a very sweet women whose husband passed away suddenly at the age of 49, I have heard challenging test diagnosis of good friends, I watched like the rest of the world a bomb go off at the finish line of a marathon and just today the devastation the tornado in Oklahoma caused. These are stories of people whose strength is being tested. One day they were doing their daily routines, and planning life and the next minute everything changed. I once read you never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have. Choosing strength during hard times is difficult but it is a choice. Everyone of these people have every right to be victims but are taking steps each day to somehow go on with their lives.
Watching the news last night while eating my dinner with my husband in my safe living room and seeing houses and lives ripped apart felt wrong to me in some way. This is not a movie, they are real lives with everything gone. Watching this made everything else seem so unimportant.
In answer to my question can we ever prepare for tragedy like this, probably not. I am now beginning to realize the things we worry about are so senseless. The things we argue over and pick on are such a waste of time. When you have lost what all of these people have arguments are the last thing they are thinking of. I am learning to appreciate all I have each and every day. I am making the calls, writing the notes. I find myself saying yes much more often than no. I try the recipes, read the books, take the walks. I do not want to wait until I am sick or have had the storm strike and say I wish I had taken better care of my life more. From witnessing the last days of people I have lost in my life through the years they are not thinking of the arguments but the love they shared. I will continue to focus on all the things that matter as there really is no time to waste. The simple things now to me are what is so important.
Princess is still limping but has come a long way in her healing. She remains nervous when we mention the word car but we are noticing the tail wag a little with excitement. I think the fear will slowly diminish but I am not sure she will ever forget. We were told we could begin to let the leash go a bit but to be honest we too are afraid for her. We want to protect her.
I bet all the special people I mentioned must feel the same way. They are limping along and slowly each week may seem a bit stronger but they are protective of their loved ones and lives. I hope somehow with social support from family, friends and community, shoulders, hugs, offers of assistance and caring people just listening will somehow help them through this. We are all one day away from being in your shoes so together we all must help each other through. We cannot just sit and think I am watching the latest headline news and just change the channel.
My heart goes out to all the people who have experienced loss and pain in their lives these past weeks and months. My prayers are with each of you. You are lessons for all of us and I write this with much gratitude to know you and I love you. You are the teachers and we can learn a lot from all of you.
I was telling someone the other day I never feared life but lately I am learning it is quite possible the finish line of our dreams does not exist. Today, this moment, is really all we are guaranteed. I do not want to find myself one day shaking if I come crashing down climbing my staircase of life. I want to know I will be able to get back up but to be perfectly honest I really do not know if I can ever fully prepare myself. Can anyone prepare themselves?
The past few months I have heard many life changing moments in peoples lives. Close family members watched there house be totally demolished as it could not be saved after Storm Sandy, I attended a wake for a very sweet women whose husband passed away suddenly at the age of 49, I have heard challenging test diagnosis of good friends, I watched like the rest of the world a bomb go off at the finish line of a marathon and just today the devastation the tornado in Oklahoma caused. These are stories of people whose strength is being tested. One day they were doing their daily routines, and planning life and the next minute everything changed. I once read you never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have. Choosing strength during hard times is difficult but it is a choice. Everyone of these people have every right to be victims but are taking steps each day to somehow go on with their lives.
Watching the news last night while eating my dinner with my husband in my safe living room and seeing houses and lives ripped apart felt wrong to me in some way. This is not a movie, they are real lives with everything gone. Watching this made everything else seem so unimportant.
In answer to my question can we ever prepare for tragedy like this, probably not. I am now beginning to realize the things we worry about are so senseless. The things we argue over and pick on are such a waste of time. When you have lost what all of these people have arguments are the last thing they are thinking of. I am learning to appreciate all I have each and every day. I am making the calls, writing the notes. I find myself saying yes much more often than no. I try the recipes, read the books, take the walks. I do not want to wait until I am sick or have had the storm strike and say I wish I had taken better care of my life more. From witnessing the last days of people I have lost in my life through the years they are not thinking of the arguments but the love they shared. I will continue to focus on all the things that matter as there really is no time to waste. The simple things now to me are what is so important.
Princess is still limping but has come a long way in her healing. She remains nervous when we mention the word car but we are noticing the tail wag a little with excitement. I think the fear will slowly diminish but I am not sure she will ever forget. We were told we could begin to let the leash go a bit but to be honest we too are afraid for her. We want to protect her.
I bet all the special people I mentioned must feel the same way. They are limping along and slowly each week may seem a bit stronger but they are protective of their loved ones and lives. I hope somehow with social support from family, friends and community, shoulders, hugs, offers of assistance and caring people just listening will somehow help them through this. We are all one day away from being in your shoes so together we all must help each other through. We cannot just sit and think I am watching the latest headline news and just change the channel.
My heart goes out to all the people who have experienced loss and pain in their lives these past weeks and months. My prayers are with each of you. You are lessons for all of us and I write this with much gratitude to know you and I love you. You are the teachers and we can learn a lot from all of you.
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